SMOOTH SOUNDS

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A WRITER NOT A SPEAKER~

In spite of my obvious obsession with words, I am not always eloquent. Often, I am, in person, at loss for words. Believe it? It is true. I am one who suffers stage fright. I won several awards for a poem, years ago, it was something that I was so proud of; I was invited to come and accept a merit award in Reno, NV. It was a huge gathering; there were to be famous writers, publishers, personalities, and so forth. I wanted to go badly, I did not. You know why? I got stage fright! Wayne Newton, and several literary notables would MC/ host the event; well, I had these visions of me, with long gown, perfectly groomed, walking up the stairs to the stage, and tripping! Ha! I let myself miss an event of my life over fear! There is no greater fear than fear itself! Another time, I was managing a restaurant, and, was given a commercial shot with a local cable provider. I was well-rehearsed, and, was fine UNTIL, the camera came upon me: I froze, you could see it in my face, it was total panic! The interviewer was skilled with dealing with frozen subjects, so,was able to lead me along. I answered stiffly, occasionally, and the rest of the time, just nodded my head... It was hilarious! I have the whole thing on tape. Sometimes, I pull it out for a good laugh! But, in reality, it is not funny; not at all! I am not exactly shy, however, I am rather timid. I am a humble being, and, I get embarrassed easily, which leads to nervousness, which leads to whatever! I have been working on this part of my character since then. It is not easy! I can manage 50 people, delegate, fire, and handle any publicity I need to, but, I falter in the face of the presence of cameras, lights, action! I am sure that when my opportunity arises again, I will at least, attempt to make the scene, however, I will yet have that knot in my gut, that racing heart, and the fear that I won't be able to confront all of those people... I do not falter easily in any other area of life, which means that I simply have to face and get past the fear of fear...

1 comment:

D. Lambert said...

I've heard that the best way to get over fear of public speaking is to practice. Of course, I've also heard the bit about picturing your audience in their underwear, and I just can't see that ending well...

Good luck!